In honor of Suicide Prevention Month, I felt like this was an important opportunity to bring light to a topic that deserves so much more than just one month of conversation.

I could sit here and list statistic after statistic. I could tell you how many people struggle with suicidal thoughts, how many lives are lost every year, or how many people are silently fighting battles. Those numbers are incredibly important, and honestly, they are devastating. But sometimes I think we hear numbers so often that we forget there are real people behind every single one of them.

So instead, I want to talk to the person behind the statistic.

I want to talk to the person who feels alone in a room full of people. The person who wakes up and immediately feels the weight of having to make it through another day. The person who has gotten so good at saying “I’m fine” that nobody thinks to ask twice. The person who feels guilty for struggling because, from the outside, their life looks like one they should be grateful for.

Pain does not need to make sense to ANYONE else in order for it to be real.

One of the things that has always bothered me most is the stigma that still surrounds mental health. We have come a long way in talking about it, but there are still so many people who are afraid to admit when they are struggling because they don't want to be viewed differently. They don't want to be dramatic. They don't want to be a burden. They don't want people to worry about them.
But struggling does not make you weak, dramatic, ungrateful, or attention seeking. Sometimes saying I need help takes way more strength than anyone on the outside could ever understand, and you should be so proud for taking that step.

I think we also need to remember that struggling does not always look the way we expect it to. It can be the person who is constantly making everyone laugh. It can be your best friend who answers every text like it’s normal. It can be the person posting pictures from an amazing vacation. It can be your coworker, your roommate, your sibling, or the stranger you pass every morning. There isn't one face for someone who is struggling.

That is why kindness matters So. Much. More. Than. We. Realize.

Always be kind.

You truly never know what someone is carrying when they walk into a room. Something as small as checking in, listening without immediately trying to fix everything, inviting someone somewhere even if they usually say no, or simply reminding somebody that they matter can mean more than you will ever know.

My entire goal with Mads on Madison has always been to create something that feels safe. I write about life, the good parts of it and the confusing parts of it, because I never want anyone reading something I've written to feel like they are the only person trying to figure everything out, because I promise you that you aren’t.

And with something this serious, I especially want that to be clear.

If you are reading this while going through something you haven't been able to put into words, I see you. If you are exhausted from fighting something inside of yourself that nobody else can see, I see you. If you feel like everyone around you is moving forward while you are simply trying to make it through the day, I see you.

And more importantly, I need you here.

Life can be incredibly challenging. It can be cruel, unfair, confusing, lonely, and completely different from what we imagined it would be. There are moments when it can become incredibly difficult to see beyond whatever is hurting right now.

But the way you feel in this moment does not have to be the way you feel forever.

There are still people you haven't met yet. Places you haven't been. Songs you haven't heard. Versions of yourself you haven't gotten the chance to become.

You don't have to have your entire life figured out. You don't even have to figure out tomorrow yet.

Sometimes you just have to stay.

And if staying feels impossible on your own, please let somebody help you carry that weight. Please tell me, I am always here. Tell a friend. Tell your family. Tell someone you trust. And if the first person doesn't understand, please tell someone else.

There is NO shame in needing help. There is NO shame in admitting that something hurts. There is NO shame in not being okay.

This month, I hope we don't only remember the people we've lost. I hope we also pay attention to the people who are still here.

Please check on your people. Check on the strong friend. Check on the funny friend. Check on the person who seems like they have everything together. Listen when somebody tells you they're struggling, and don't make them feel like they have to justify why.

And please remember to check on yourself, too.

You deserve the same kindness you so easily give to everyone else.

You are loved. You are important. You are worthy of being heard. And even if your mind is telling you otherwise right now, your presence in this world matters more than you know. Please stay.

If you or someone you know is struggling or in crisis, you can call or text 988 in the United States to reach the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline. If there is immediate danger, call 911 or go to the nearest emergency department. Be the goodness you hope to see in the world, we’re all just trying to make it by. Let’s all love one another.